work is leaving me sad and my body feels heavy i droop on my walk home. i call comfort i call my mom i call friends in other states i keep shrugging.
the week goes by fast when you are consumed by consumption. when you are stress eating and drinking. when you are full of knots and cramps in your belly.
when you miss being comfortable. forgetting you weren't always.
knowing full well you're breaking hearts, first and foremost, the quietest most hidden, is your own.
i know i'm messing up. i just fucking shrug at it.
i miss who i was but who i remember myself as being i never felt at the time. i'm always missing something. or someone. or who i was at a certain time when i forgot to notice.
i feel like i'm in a dream world. i feel it's strength that gets me thru this and weakness that drags me along.